What waiting for help can feel like.

We have been waiting since September 2020. My son is now seven. He self-harms, has suicidal thoughts, does not go to school and barely leaves the house. CAMHS discharged him because they said his mental health was caused by the delay in getting a diagnosis.

I have spent years being told to wait and watch while my child gets worse. Every door we have knocked on has closed.

My child has a one-to-one worker in school, risk assessments, and staff carrying walkie-talkies because he is such a flight risk. Yet we are still waiting for an assessment.

We have reached crisis point. My son runs away from school and home, climbs out of windows and has no sense of danger when he is dysregulated. I have two younger children I physically cannot leave behind to go after him.

I chased my nine-year-old through the streets for over 40 minutes. I have been left covered in bruises trying to keep him safe. I am terrified one day I will not catch him.

We were told our child was not bad enough for one service, but too complex for another. We have been passed backwards and forwards for years.

School keeps telling us they do not have the funding or staff to give our child what they need. They are trying their best, but they are overwhelmed.

We are paying hundreds of pounds every month to go private because we could not watch our child suffer any longer. No family should have to go into debt just to get their child assessed.

My daughter is the star pupil at school, but as soon as she comes home the mask comes off. She spends hours in complete meltdown and people do not believe us because they do not see it.

We have had police involved, social work involved and safeguarding concerns raised, but we are still waiting for an assessment.

Our child talks about wanting to die, yet we are told to wait years because it is just neurodevelopmental.

The hardest part is not even the waiting. It is constantly feeling like nobody believes you.

Every rejection feels like someone telling you your child is not struggling enough to deserve help.

I do not want to skip the queue. I just want someone to hear us before our child reaches crisis.

Assessment before crisis should not be a campaign. It should already be how the system works.

My child was not too unwell for help. He became too unwell because help never came.

We have spent years proving our child is struggling. Every rejection has come at the cost of their mental health.

I do not fear the diagnosis. I fear what will happen while we are forced to wait for one.

My child has spoken about wanting to die before anyone has agreed to assess them.

We were told to come back when things got worse. They did. Now we are living with the consequences.

The system waited for crisis. My child paid the price.

Our child is seven years old. They should be worrying about playgrounds, not suicidal thoughts.

We have had police, social work, safeguarding meetings and school interventions. Somehow, that is still not enough to access an assessment.

The only thing moving quickly is my child's decline.

We do not need another referral. We need someone to say, 'We believe you.'

I do not want compensation. I want accountability, so no other family has to live like this.

Parents are being forced into debt to buy the assessment that should have been available through the NHS.

Every year we wait, our child falls further behind while their anxiety grows stronger.

Children are being excluded from school before they are even given the chance to understand why they are struggling.

We are expected to keep our children safe while the services designed to help them tell us to wait.

Families are surviving, not living. Every day is about preventing the next crisis.

Nobody should have to prove their child is broken enough before they are worthy of help.

You should not have to wait until your child is self-harming before someone finally listens.

This is not about queue jumping. It is about stopping children reaching breaking point before they are seen.

Assessment before crisis is not an unreasonable ask. It is the bare minimum our children deserve.

We waited four years. My son left school with next to no qualifications because he was constantly removed from classrooms for being impulsive or unable to sit still.

Parent of a 17-year-old

The school knew we were waiting for an assessment but refused to put support in place because he did not have a formal diagnosis.

Parent in Scotland

His self-esteem and confidence hit an all-time low. It caused problems within our family and in the community. An emergency referral was made, but we were told he still did not meet the criteria.

Parent of a teenager

He has not been to school in a year. He is angry every day. Recently he has started locking himself in rooms with knives. I have had to call the police. I have told CAMHS and social work everything, but we are still being told he is not a child in need.

Parent currently seeking crisis support

I told them when he was young: if you do not help me now, I will not be able to manage his needs as a teenager. That is exactly what has happened.

Parent of a teenager

We have been waiting since she was one. We were told her assessment should happen this summer. Summer has been and gone, and we are still waiting.

Parent of an 8-year-old

She is in P4 but still struggling with P1-level work. I keep being told she will catch up and just needs to focus more.

Parent awaiting an autism assessment

My son was referred at the end of P2. He is going into P7 now and I have had to fight every step of the way.

Parent in Scotland

Seven weeks of school holidays. I am a broken mum with a broken child. No help. No support. Our family will never recover from this. We have been totally abandoned.

Parent awaiting support

My daughter is five and waiting for ADHD and autism assessments. School keeps putting her in time-outs because she cannot sit still. When I explained she was awaiting assessment, I was told she was just being bad.

Parent of a 5-year-old

The ADHD assessment waiting list has closed where we live unless a child also has a mental health condition. My child hurts himself and others daily. We have zero support.

Parent of an autistic child

My son is 18 now. He never received an assessment or the support he needed. He sat on waiting lists while being victimised at school and in the community because he struggled socially.

Parent of an 18-year-old

My daughter is autistic, but I believe there is something else going on too. She is struggling so much at school, isolated, anxious and unhappy. I feel completely useless watching my own daughter go through it.

Parent of a 10-year-old

I fought for seven years for my daughter to be taken seriously. Now I am starting the same fight again with my youngest.

Mum of two

My daughter's referral was rejected three times despite teachers, an educational psychologist, doctors and health visitors all raising the same concerns. It was only after I complained and contacted my MSP that the referral was accepted.

Parent in Scotland

I know a diagnosis will not magically fix everything. But being denied access to medication that might help makes me furious. My seven-year-old is going through school unable to concentrate and struggling to maintain relationships. We have been failed.

Parent of a 7-year-old